Book

Your Undeniable Yes

I sit down to think about what would actually make me really sure this was the right relationship to be in.  All signs point to yes so far, and we’ve discussed some really deep questions through the 100 Questions to Fall in Love.  I like what I hear from him, but of course, I’ve said that before. 

I again get out my trusty journal and pen.  What would an undeniable yes look like? 

He’s into a Life Commitment.

Together we commit to being in love, good communication, healthful living, deepening awakening journey, mutual support, commitment to relationship and absolut sexual loyalty, collaboration on the journey of life.

  • I need him to be available for conscious exploration of love and commitment, 
  • has a daily meditation practice, looks like a hottie, wants to live his life with me, values minimalism, kaizen, and communal living. 
  • Clearly demonstrates healthy communication patterns, has already resolved his childhood trauma and can speak about it with distance and awareness…
  • Wants to dream together.  
  • Is a “do’er” and gets shit done. He inspires me.
  • My family and friends think he’s great for me, 
  • We handle challenges with consciousness and grace.  We are able to plan together and bring those plans to fruition.  
  • We have aligned dreams for life, longevity and freedom.  

All of that sounds good, but I think about the Mr. D who was a lot of those things, but the intimacy fell flat. I’m not into a sexless functional relationship.  It’s got to be hot, fun, playful and expansive. I want to be ravished by my Undeniable Yes Lover!

Lover Undeniable YES 

  • His cock is great and fits me perfectly.  
  • He values my pleasure, he cares about my feelings, he’s demonstrated he is interested to learn how to be a better partner/lover to me.
  • I feel aligned with kind of intimacy I want with him, he loves to eat me out, he fucks me so deep.
  • We have navigated challenging intimacy conversations with grace, 
  • I love to explore his pleasure, he turns me on physically, his body is yummy, 
  • there are things I can’t describe in words but I will be able to feel if it works when we “try them out”

And then children. I thought I had a lot of this with the Mr. D I left lovingly in Mexico, but actually he always felt he was too old to have a family.  So what would I need to know was true between us before I opened my body up to conceive with this man.  I need to know this is possible BEFORE I get into an 8 month relationship with him. 

My Undeniable Yes for Children with Him

  • I am completely committed to this relationship, when ovulating AND menstruating for 6+ months.
  • We have clear communication as a regular practice for 1+ year, where we have handled any challenges that came along within 1-2 weeks in simple ways. 
  • Have created a shared spiritual space and are operating that in easeful ways.
  • Income stabilization around recurring income that makes it seem simple easy to live together and add children.
  • Discussion and clarity around desired birth, pregnancy and parenting styles (attachment parenting, breastfeeding, co-sleeping, free birth, diet, spirituality, family intention, visioning legacy and ancestry of our brood, etc) 
  • Clarity around timing and desired plan for conception/contraception between children
  • We have done meditation journey of 1-3 days together to connect to the soul of our first child.
  • We have 1-4 friends who are with us, and are willing support the baby birthing phase and postpartum. 
  • Health insurance from Canada is functioning, incase shit. 
  • He has a level of resolved-ness with any debt and taxes that he feel safe and he is comfortable with.
  • Feeling vibrant and healthy in our bodies, souls and mind. 
  • A feeling of YES NOW, YES YOU! for creating our children. ALL THE TIME! 
  • Clearly communicated to my/your family that conception is our intention and received their blessing in it.
  • We have completed a vitamin and cleansing protocol 3-6 months prior to conception.
  • High levels of intimacy pleasure and connection are normal, and we have the capacity to cum together on a regular basis with ease.
  • Ceremonial removal of the IUD, and practicing 3-6 months of conscious non-pregnancy.
  • Location lined up for birthing baby and phase 2 of their life (ie 4-12 months)
  • Commitment to minimum of 3 years together per birth, and 18 years of financial support of the child.  Ideal would be a full commitment to our relationship for life based on our circles of commitment practice.
  • As we commit to making children together, we commit to peaceful and supportive interaction with each other around the children no matter what happens in our relationship. 
  • We both commit to physically, financially and emotionally support the children for 21 years while they are moving into adulthood.

Now it’s your turn dear reader. You can cross out the things from my list that don’t appeal to you, circle things you love, and add your own in the space below.

How do you actually find time for you?

Somedays the kids drive you crazy! It's the little things we do EVERY DAY that support you or leave you exhausted.  You get angry at them when they fight, complain, or ask for your attention CONSTANTLY.   It feels like it's never ending.  

You know you need to take time for yourself... but when?
How? Video yoga at home with kids around? Ya right!

I hear you. 

Mom Self Care needs to be simple, easy, repeatable and effective.  

That's why I've brought together all the best tools for transformation of psyche that I've encountered, combined with bio-hacking and ancient tantric breath.  Learning joygasmic secrets opens new ways to deal with ancestral trauma. becomes simple as you bio-hack your way  through the nervous system regulation trial that is life as mother.


The 7 Minute Self Love Bootcamp

Put your name and email below to try this challenge and get started with a simple bio hack that saved my life and will radically improve yours. 42 Kisses can save an afternoon or your marriage, teach body positivity or awaken your desire and sustain the courage of mothers through the most challenging vulnerable times of their lives. We need these tools to be great mothers and vibrant women in all areas of our lives.

They push your buttons. Daily. This can help.

Soft Audio Boundaries.  Subconscious Brain Re-Training.   Radical Self Care.










Still here? Maybe you need some background on why I'm sharing this...

As a single parent for many years, I know what it's like to live in daily overwhelm that seems it will never end.

After suffering from severe post-partum depression for 7 years, and an abusive relationship that I couldn't seem to quit, I developed a case of seriously self destructive self talk about being a "horrible mother". I knew I needed to do something different, but couldn't seem to shake old patterns.

I took every personal development class that came my way for 3 years straight.  3 day weekend intensives 3x month. After a while started to experiment with the few things that HAD been working to bring me more peace, and combined them into one power packed (and quick) experience, to help find that inner peace, and make progress towards my goal of ACTUALLY feeling good.

I built the first brain training track after listening to a John Asaraf course.  Things started changing for me in a big way and with these tracks I've been able to stop experiencing irrational anger towards my first child (who I had medical birth bonding trauma).  I'm no longer experiencing mental health challenges, attracted a wonderful man into my life who is a great father to her son so much more I dreamed of.

Now I spend my days writing, baby tending and helping other mothers  manage and reduce their stress, build healthier relationships, stop sounding like their mothers, and live lives they once only dreamed of.

I put the best, worst and naughtiest of it into this epic 444 page memoir to help myself and you recover from the culturally normalized rape that is all to rampant in the world right now.

Choose Your Own Adventure to Heal Your Trauma

Free or choose a donation

Mr. D and the Joygasm Queen

If you've ever loved and lost, you know that in the aftermath of a broken heart, nothing seems worthwhile.  

This book is a vulnerable, raw exploration of the 21st Century shadow of "failed nuclear family" and takes you on a journey to heal your own heart, brain, and body from the pain of feeling alone in a world that doesn't seem to care. 

I offers "what actually worked" for me to heal from the inside out all while traveling the world as a single mom-preneur.